“Chivalry isn’t dead… Just endangered!” – a man’s take on Chivalry

“Chivalry never died, the Gentlemen in most men did”

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OK, ladies why don’t you take some time to relax, sit back; pull out a magazine or enjoy an hour of a nap; while I talk to the gentlemen here. But if you would like to hear me rant about what I feel about this topic do carry on reading. So gentlemen, you know this talk is inevitable, you are either going to hear it from me or your dad, friend or a stranger in some way or another.

So let me just put it out there, you might be a good man, a great one or an exceptional one but if you are not a GENTLEMAN; then the rest is just a tag you can put on you name or someone put when they talk about you. Now I am NOT here to say that ladies are the weaker gender or we are stronger than them; I wouldn’t dare say that especially when Ronda Rousey is the current world champ. I am just here to put into perspective what it is to be a gentleman. Now to give you a heads up I am nowhere close to being a gentleman but trust me I am trying to. The journey isn’t easy and sometimes harder as you go along, but it is a choice. It’s not about who you are today but the legacy you leave behind tomorrow.

Holding the door for a lady or pulling a chair for her are a few of the things you could do, but learning to do it regardless of the appreciation that you receive from them or any other that you come by. There are times when I have opened and held the door for ladies who are completely oblivious to the gesture. I held the door, not because they are ladies but because I am trying to be a gentleman, however, I try not to let that stop me from holding the door for another lady next time around. I am privileged to have known quite a few men in my life who are true gentlemen and as I see them, I too wish to be like them. Being a gentleman, like other things in our life is a process and a regular push to be better in every part of our lives. The only reason I am using ‘holding the door’ and ‘pulling a chair’ as examples are because even these two we men forget to do on a regular basis, something as small and as simple as that.

Does “Suiting Up” make you more of a gentleman?. I’d say no. A well-tailored suit makes the wearer a gentleman as much as plastic foil around my hand makes it a chicken wrap. But well-dressed gentlemen do have their perks. Ask Bond, I am sure he would agree with me on this one. But your dressing sense is the least of your worry when it comes to becoming a gentleman. Like everything else it all starts with the mind and manifests into reality. But many gentlemen are defined by how they carry themselves regardless of who is looking. So cheers to you if you got it button down as well!.

Now, ladies you too have a role to play in us men becoming gentlemen. So here is something women don’t know about men, we only change when we want to be better for a lady who knows what she wants from her man; rather than a girl who lets him become who he wants and not say anything about it. It is true that a man has to choose a place that he is going to take you for a nice dinner, but make sure that each time he decides don’t keep saying “well I am not in mood of Italian, decide a place which has Chinese or something else” or “you know I don’t like Indian” (not the race, just the cuisine). This makes your man question himself because he obviously wants you to have a great time as well. Give him an opinion like “Let’s have Chinese today”. You getting the drift?. Want your man to be a gentleman, be a lady to him. Want him to open the car door for you, wait till he opens the door for you. Want him to pull the chair for you, stand till he does that. Unfortunately, many men are not taught to do this so make sure you communicate it to him, don’t stand to wait for the oblivious fella to open the door which he has never been taught to. And later get pissed at him that he didn’t do it. Sister’s, teach your brother’s how to treat a woman. That’s how I began learning.

Being better is a daily choice and not a battle you have to fight or conquer, you are already great you just need to let yourself and others see that side of you.

If you guys think otherwise or have something to add to this do comment below. Thanks for viewing! Cheers!

 “Being a male is a matter of birth, being a man is a matter of age but being a gentleman is a matter of choice” – Unknown